Monday, September 26, 2022

My Husband Is Dying Of Prostate Cancer

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Advanced Prostate Cancer Symptoms

10 Warning Signs of Prostate Cancer

Men with advanced prostate cancer may experience additional symptoms. Thats because the cancer has spread from the prostate to other parts of the body, such as the bones or lymph nodes.

A wide range of treatment options are available for managing advanced cancer. These treatments kill cancer cells, but they may also help patients manage pain.

Signs of metastatic prostate cancer may include:

  • Swelling in legs or pelvic area
  • Numbness or pain in the hips, legs or feet
  • Bone pain that persists or leads to fractures

Making Decisions About Micks Future Treatment

Next the consultant went through a list of things that could happen to Mick so that he could decide if he wanted the doctors to treat them or not.

Mick decided to have antibiotics as long as he could take them himself. He didnt want to be given anything through a tube. But he did want blood transfusions if they continued to help a bit. He put a do not resuscitate wish in place.

The doctor explained that Mick could choose between having less or more pain medication. Less could mean he was in pain but more could make him drowsy or confused.

Mick was also able to tell them that if he wasnt able to make decisions, he wanted me to make them on his behalf.

My Husband Is Dying Of Prostate Cancer

The only other thing I was drinking in the first 6 months after my diagnosis was green tea. I would drink about 4 glasses of green tea daily to go along with the increased water intake. I wasnt putting any other liquid into my body for the first 6 months. This was a big help in starting my road to recovery.

Once I started feeling better then I added organic soy milk to my diet as well. Soy milk isnt much like regular milk but once you get used to it then its not bad at all. To this day these are the only 3 liquids I have in my diet. To recap the 3 liquids I drink today are purified water,green tea,& organic soy milk. I put no other liquids into my body period.

Now, I want to chat a little more about meat & other aspects of a proper diet. As I said we dont need meat to live. I thought cutting or limiting meat in my diet would be to hard to accomplish. Well again my thinking was wrong. Was it easy? No! However, after a couple weeks then things were starting to get easier. I didnt cut all meats out of my diet but I did cut certain meats & eat moderate amounts of all others.

One meat that needs to be completely cut or at least very minimized is red meat . Too much Red meat consumption is not good for prostate health. I was eating a lot of fast food burgers & also red meat at home. I will say to at least cut red meat completely out of your diet until you get your prostate health back.

Recommended Reading: How To Relieve Enlarged Prostate Symptoms

Talking To Andrew’s Doctor

For fifteen months, Andrew responded really well to treatment and was feeling reasonably good. But then he developed a very bad spinal cord compression. He was unable to walk and at that point it was clear that things were very serious. He spent nearly a month in hospital and his consultant told us that the cancer was back with a vengeance and that they wanted to fast track him home.

Andrew didnt want to know how long he might have. I know that he knew what the score was but that he just didnt want to speak about it.

Andrew didnt want to know how long he might have.

I asked Andrews doctor how long he might live for. She told me that she could give me some indication of how long Andrew might live for if I wanted to know. I wasnt sure that I wanted to know if Andrew didnt it might have created a barrier between us.

I wanted to know what I should expect. But I wasnt sure that I wanted to know how long Andrew would live for if he didn’t know.

But I wanted to know what I should expect. I needed to plan what was going to happen when he came home, the arrangements that would need to be made and whether I needed to speak to other members of our family and friends. At this point I think I felt quite out of control, so speaking to the consultant was my way of regaining some of that control and it helped me to plan for his homecoming.

Its difficult to accept that cancer takes its own route at its own pace.

How Does Prostate Cancer Kill You In The End

What is prostate cancer? Women speak out on LETHAL disease
  • How Does Prostate Cancer Kill You in the End? Center
  • Prostate cancer is the most common cancer after skin cancer in men in the US and the second leading cause of cancer death. Prostate-specific antigen testing has made the detection of prostate cancer easier in its early stages. Ninety-two out of 100 men get diagnosed when the cancer is limited to the prostate.

    Most men are diagnosed with prostate cancer in their senior years and only 1 out of 36 men die from it. Death from prostate cancer most often happens when cancer has spread to other organs in the body. This is known as the advanced stage of prostate cancer.

    The chances of survival decrease as cancer spreads beyond the prostate. If cancer has metastasized to other parts of the body, only three out of 10 men will survive for five years after the diagnosis.

    Advanced stage prostate cancer or metastasized prostate cancer

    Cancerous cells may spread to organs other than the site of origin. In the case of prostate cancer, this tendency is decreased, but it can happen. Advanced stage prostate cancer is defined based on the Gleason score, which is based on the TNM staging of cancer. T stands for tumor size, N stands for lymph node involvement and M stands for metastasis.

    Prostate cancer can kill in the end through metastases that can develop in

    Metastasis to the liver can affect the livers ability to filter out toxins from the body. This can eventually lead to jaundice, nausea, loss of appetite and weight loss.

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    Coping With My Husband Who Has Terminal Cancer

    I just wondered if there is anyone else in a similar position to me. My husband has terminal cancer , he is only 52 and this has all started from a dodgy mole discovered in June. I feel I am on a very lonely and scary journey .

    Hi Paddock

    Really sorry to hear that – I’m at the other end of that journey – my wife died after 3 years of cancer back in October.

    I don’t know your position – how long you think you have with your husband, whether he is having treatment, how capable he is etc. but yes it is scary but it doesn’t have to be lonely.

    You have him, for now at least, and you’ll want to spend as much time as you can with him. Do friends and familly know? or is he one of these people who doesn’t want people to know? that can be difficult.

    In any event you’ll find lots of people on here in very similar situations who will be more than ready to offer advice,support or just sympathise when you’re having a bad day.

    In time you may even find that you can offer such advice and support to others – you’d be amazed how theraputic that can be.

    Sorry you are here but welcome none the less

    Hi Graham

    Thank you for your reply and I’m sorry to hear of your loss.

    Yes , friends & family know, but I feel that unless you are going through or have gone through this awful illness, then it is very difficult for anyone to fully appreciate the journey that I am on.

    We are both trying to be up beat and positive but some days it is just so hard.

    Hi Paddock

    Why Cant My Doctor Tell Me How Long Ive Got To Live

    Its hard for your doctor to be sure how long you will live and they may be reluctant to give you an exact timescale. They may be able to give you an estimate but you may live longer or, unfortunately, you may live for less time than this. Although the future is uncertain, for many people its important to plan ahead and make the most of the days when you feel well.

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    How Do I Say Goodnight When It’s Time To Leave The Hospital

    The separation caused by hospitalization is particularly traumatic to the family. They leave the hospital each evening and worry about whether their loved one will ever again lead a normal life, or whether he or she will even leave the hospital. Feeling powerless, they need to give of themselves. Fortunately there are many practical services a patients family and friends can perform while the patient is in the hospitalservices such as feeding, walking, turning, and massaging. These, along with the offer of special foods, a favorite pillow, or a comforting hand, become the routine of the daily hospital visit, giving solace to the family and friends as well as to the patient.

    When the patient is critically ill, it is not unusual for at least one family member to be in attendance around the clock. This may mean sleeping in a chair beside the patients bed. To obtain up-to-date information on the patients condition, relatives may rearrange their schedules so as to be present when the doctor makes rounds or a particularly helpful nurse is on duty.

    How Do We Deal With The Wear And Tear Of Living With Cancer Long Term

    How Cancer Kills You: Swamp Gas

    When a person has fought long and hard against cancer, losing and regaining hope many times, and then realizes that the battle is not to be won, he or she may, at times, experience rage or depression that will focus on the nearest available personthe patients spouse or significant other, child, parent, friend, or the nurse on duty. This anger usually manifests itself as irritation over trivial matters that normally would not even concern the patient. The person under attack needs to understand that this is not a rejection, but a cry of anguish.

    In addition to anger and depression, a patient must also endure the endless boredom of being ill, as well as the fear of being a burden when he or she really wants and needs special attention. Ironically, the people from whom this attention is demanded may be suffering from the same tedium or from feelings of inadequacy and guilt for being unable to relieve the suffering. They may not be able to cope with the reality in which the patient is imprisoned. The result may be a gradual diminishing of attention and care by the family, and increased bitterness and fear of isolation for the patient.

    No one should be blamed for the ways he or she responds to the crisis of a long-term illness or the threat of change and loss. Some people and some relationships grow stronger, experiencing new depths of love, respect, and understanding some waver, yet hold together and some collapse.

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    Possible Changes In Breathing

    • Breathing may speed up and slow down due to less blood circulation and build-up of waste products in the body
    • Patient may grunt while breathing
    • Neck muscles may look tight to help breathe
    • Mucus in the back of the throat may cause rattling or gurgling with each breath
    • The patient may not breathe for periods of up 10 to 30 seconds

    Watchful Waiting And Active Surveillance

    Watchful waiting is an adequate approach in patients who are at low risk of death from prostate cancer because of their limited life expectancy due to severe comorbidities.26,27 Watchful waiting resulted in similar overall survival when compared with radical prostatectomy, but disease-specific survival was better in patients who had undergone surgery.26 For some patients it turns out to be hard to persist on a watchful waiting policy, and many men drop out and seek active treatment within several years, mostly when PSA elevation is noted.

    Active surveillance is a novel and fascinating approach to distinguish between patients who are at higher risk and need active therapy and patients who are at low risk for disease progression.27,28 This approach avoids the risks of therapy while allowing early detection of those patients who are prone to progress. In these high-risk individuals, delayed active treatment is offered. Periodic monitoring of the PSA serum level, digital rectal exam, and repeated prostate biopsies are performed in patients who are on active surveillance, and active therapy is started when predefined threshold values are reached. This concept makes it possible to offer curative treatment to individuals who are at high risk for disease progression as indicated by active surveillance parameters.

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    Possible Changes In Consciousness

    • More sleeping during the day
    • Hard to wake or rouse from sleep
    • Confusion about time, place, or people
    • Restless, might pick or pull at bed linen
    • May talk about things unrelated to the events or people present
    • May have more anxiety, restlessness, fear, and loneliness at night
    • After a period of sleepiness and confusion, may have a short time when they are mentally clear before going back into semi-consciousness

    Living As A Prostate Cancer Survivor

    Women say their husbands died waiting for cancer care from VA

    For most men with prostate cancer, treatment can remove or destroy the cancer. Completing treatment can be both stressful and exciting. You may be relieved to finish treatment, but find it hard not to worry about cancer growing or coming back. This is very common if youve had cancer.

    For other men, the cancer may come back in other parts of the body or may never go away completely. These men may get hormone treatment or other therapies to help keep the cancer under control for as long as possible. Learning to live with cancer that does not go away can be difficult and very stressful.

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    How Do I Talk About My Cancer To Others

    How open you should be about the fact that you have cancer or about how your treatment is going is entirely up to you. There is no single right way to talk about it. There are no right words to use. Like everyone else, you will have to find your own comfort zone and the words youre most comfortable using. If you would rather talk about your malignancy or tumor or growth or lump or problem than keep using the word cancer all the time, so be it.

    Although it can be hard, it makes sense to be open and direct with your family and close friends if you feel comfortable doing that. Without candor and openness, concerned relatives and friends are left with their own darkest imaginings. They have their own fears and frustrations that will only grow into terrifying phantoms if they are left behind a veil of secrecy and ignorance of what you are really experiencing. A mutual confrontation of fears is a good way of keeping your own fears and the fears of others under control.

    Being open doesnt mean that you have to start every conversation with the story of your latest aches and pains. Nor, if someone asks how you feel, do you necessarily have to answer with a long detailed description. The litany of the person who wants sympathy or empathyIve got it bad. It hurts here and here. Ive got to get this treatmentmakes a lot of people want to avoid you. People with cancer are often avoided because, by their own conversation, only bad things seem to happen to them.

    Discussion Is Better Than Assumption

    Do not assume that you know what your spouse is thinking or feeling about the cancer, or that you know what he or she needs from you. You might think your spouse is mostly scared, when actually he or she feels more sad or perhaps guilty about the consequences of the cancer for you. You might think that your spouse is strong and resilient, when actually he or she feels vulnerable and dependent on you, but may not want to let you know that. You might think that your loved one wants you to offer encouragement and hope, when actually he or she just wants you to say Im with you in what you are feeling, and well face this together no matter what happens.

    The point is to talk with your spouse about his or her emotional reactions and concerns and to ask what your spouse needs from you. Some of these needs may be concrete or practical: going together to doctors appointments, becoming educated about his or her cancer and the treatment options, handling all the phone calls from friends and relatives, and taking over more household chores. Other needs may be more emotional: being attuned and responsive to what your spouse is feeling, encouraging your spouse to confide in you, and offering empathy and support during difficult times.

    Also Check: What Is Adenocarcinoma Of The Prostate

    The Final Days To Weeks Of Life

    Providing excellent care toward the end of life requires an ability to anticipate when to focus mainly on palliation of symptoms and quality of life instead of disease treatment. Prognostic information plays an important role for making treatment decisions and planning for the EOL. However, the available literature suggests that medical providers inaccurately predict how long patients will live and tend to overestimate survival times. This appears to hold true even for providers who are experienced in treating patients who are terminally ill. In a multicenter cohort study of 230 hospitalized patients with advanced cancer, palliative care providers correctly predicted time to death for only 41% of patients. Survival time was overestimated in 85% of patients for whom medical providers gave inaccurate predictions, and providers were particularly likely to overestimate survival for Black and Latino patients.

    Providers attempting to make prognostic determinations may attend to symptoms that may herald the EOL , or they may observe trends in patients functional status.

    The investigators assigned patients to one of four states:

    • Stable .
    • Dead.

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